Healing

I think the thing the made me start changing my life was being sick with pneumonia. I first was admitted to the hospital was on May 27th 2010.

I will go into more details, and blogged during my time in and out of the hospital and I will be reposting posts from that time on this blog.

But during that time I LEARNED a lot about my self and about what my life to me and where my life was heading.

I finally got better when my tonsils were removed in march 2011. But during those 11 months i learned more about myself more then i ever had at that point. I learned I could be brave, strong, solo and alone. You spend A LOT of time alone when you are in the hospital.

It also gave me guides as to where I was headed. It was in the hospital where i realized that i did not want to be a teacher anymore.

It was in the hospital i learned who and WHAT really mattered to me. and more importantly WHY things, people and DREAMS were important to me. And I learned that I was not happy with my life. In fact I think my unhappiness lead me to getting SO sick.

One of my worst experiences in the hospital was when I had a pic-line inserted in my right arm. Yup, that was worse then the tube they put into my left lung for four days to drain the liquid in my long and WAY worse then the 4 cat scans I had.

Thank goodness my step mom Rena was able to come out and be there for me during that procedure. Because I don't think i could have done it without someone there for me. And thank goodness she was there to demand morphine immediately after, the procedure had to be done "sober" and damn that shit HURT.

It was also serendipitous that Cassandra's Mom (Cassandra is now my best friend in LA) was the one who took care of my pic line once it was inserted, and she even removed it on my 28th birthday (BEST BIRTHDAY PRESENT EVER).

Life is weird and has unexpected events that you don't necessarily for see coming that often later seem to fit into the puzzle of your life in ways you can only realize in reflection.


I can't wait to repost some of my "hospital" posts because I am amazingly positive in them. And that positively i kept back then, is something I tried have to attain why I transitioned into my new life.

In any case, everyday, in sense, we are all "healing" and trying to achieve the life we want, dream of and know we can attain. Life is weird and things don't ever easy but they can be HAPPY!!


LOVE YOU ALL AND HAPPY SATURDAY!!

LOVE, Amber Lane xoxo

P.S. GOOOO NINERS!!!! #BAYAREA